Please dont hate me...its just how I feel....

We, The Gulty Party.....

Not only will this make light some things, but it may also come across rude to some people. For that I apologize. I started writing a blog because I wanted to voice my oppinions on some things going on and tell cool stories of our experiences. As you read, keep in mind that my oppinion is neither fact, nor popular belief, but my opinion only. Remember that Ty and I are a fairly unknown band, who has yet to see any level of success beyond working on building a fan base and therfore, our view is slightly different from the next level of musicians, and even promoters, bookers, and arena performers. I say none of this to complain, but to say what I see and if you disagree, please comment politely as I will write this as politely as I know how.


I have only lived in Salt Lake for a few years. We started performing here about 3 years ago. I love it. Seriously, Yes, there is a group of people that everyone wants to be a part of that gets asked to play everything that I secretly long for, but acceptance is never THAT big a deal. I just say they haven’t heard us yet and we aren’t quite ready ;) But honestly. Salt Lake has a scene. Its big. There are shows I have no idea are even happening. BUT. We don’t have a large fan base yet, though its growing. Thats fine. This trip to heaven through music is the ride I love. People come out of nowhere here with these talents that make me want to kill myself. But, no one goes to their shows. And then, if they dont give up, sometimes, that changes. But many give up. Or take 2-3 year breaks. It can probably still happen for them, but I dont see how you can be full time trying to just get people to hear you because you want to share what you love to do, and feel oh so good doing, and then just stop. Things in life happen. Horrible things. Yes. I get that. I dont want anyone to think if they lost a family member or something that I would look down on stepping back. I also wouldnt expect you to judge me for playing as soon as I could because it releases my deamons and I personally would need that.
One of the most beautiful things about musicians is that we get up on stage and bear our souls. It is so fun to meet other musicians here and see these people that are SOOOO good. But, even the flowers need manure. There are also some bands that are ok and a few that are amazing that get ALL the bills. Sometimes I feel so jealous but then I realize that I need to look at this differently. Its survival of the fittest. If fans could all focus on 35 bands at a time with their undying love and money they would obviously be rich and have endless time and manpower to do so. Following a band is A LOT of work!!! So, we earn fans. They aren’t in stock at Wal-Mart and just because 25 people are in the audience doesn’t mean you now have 25 new fans. At best? 2 email listers.
And guess what. Facebook is on its way out because of musicians. Yep. I said it. Here is what we do. We are locusts on social media and open the doors to spammers and Phishers because we send out so much shit that does not apply to 99% of the people we send it to. We did it to Myspace, now we are doing it to Facebook. Ready? Here it is. The way to never get another 20 Billion Reply All Messages that all say stop hitting Reply All. Go to your friends lists, and make folders that you can name. Add people in certain areas to each corresponding name and then when you make invites, send them out to those groups which apply. Do you know I never look at my invites anymore and many other people dont either. Why? Because I have 10 invites to an event in Nashville that I have nothing to do with and its a band I have never heard of and I got an invite from all the band members as they all make their own events! WHAT!??!?! Wow.
Now, I really would love to hear from other musicians if this is the same for you in your city at our level.
There seems to be this thing where all the musicians (us included) ask everyone to come to our shows and then not go to other peoples. Feel my pain here. Last week:
Monday, work 8-5 5:30-7:45; Make dinner and eat, Ty usually some graphics stuff, me practicing or booking. 8:00-12 Salt City Indie Arts Sound-Off Competition. home. Sleep.
Tuesday work 8-5 work. After dinner about 6:30-1 am Final Acoustic All-Stars Picks and email send out. These werent forum letters people. We sent out all rejections (which I HATE having to do. It sucks!)personalized. We realized this year though that we need to call anyone we didnt accept for many reasons and for this we apologize. We owed you that and we appreciate everyone taking it so graciously. I know we are not Bonaroo or something but rejection is never easy. There was SO much talent it makes me sick. lol.
Wednesday 8-5 work, 7:30- 10:30 ish Jam with Brian Bingham and Whitney Blayne for a show we are woking on.
Thursday, 8-5 work, 7:00- 9 practice 9-1 graphics and contract work.
Friday 8-5 work, 5:30 shop for house concert liquor and such, 7:30 arrivals for house concert. show w Silver Glen ended about 12 partied till 2.
Saturday; 10:00 wake for Utah Musicians Breakfast Club, meet, breakfast from 11:15- 12:30, started blogging and Ty graphics. 9:00-1 show at GoodTimes Saloon in Layton.
This is a full time job. Anyone who puts their time into anything has a similar schedule with different inserts. So, literally, if we didnt work on the AAS we could go see shows on weekdays, but we play every weekend. Heres the delema. How am I supposed to be mad that you didnt show at my show, when I missed yours? I saw someone on Face Book post on this the other day. Its a good point. I am not sure why but we all seem to bark up the wrong tree. Ok, we need bigger paying shows to live off of music. Fact. But I am friends with mostly musicians which is cool for gig trading, but I know very few people outside of that and unwittingly seem to make little effort to do so. Shazaam. Guess what. “Hey guys I am playing friday night, come and bring your friends” “Oh sorry. I am playing Friday night and my friends with be with me.”
How do we combat this? Is there a way? Are there a neumerous amount of music players and a small group of music lovers? Thousands of bands are competing for thousands of the same exact fans on a weekly basis.
Harsh--->......Guess what. Thats our fault. Ty and I are not the answer here. I mean to stay far away from that presumption. We have very far to get anywhere near the point where we can make any dent anywhere from the performance side. That comes with time and we are new. There seems to be a pull to be an epic musical battle with lightening and forces of nature new to man between the band, and the solo chick who is just as bad ass, and the one man band guy who sounds just like a band anyway all playing the same night. I bet Nashville is a LOT like that.
I wonder sometimes if we help each other more, that would bring more to this large yet quiet scene without ruining what it is. I see a lot of people trying to do this, but they go about it the wrong way. No one wants to get 1000 emails in 20 minutes because you added them to yet another group. Ya. Groups are a great idea, but I hate when I get invited to a group because I have no option of denying said invite. I also believe that we dont share other people with our fans like we should and if we do they’re the same 5 people/bands. We are guilty of this. We tend to get burned and stick with those we feel we can rely on because so many unmotivated bands come and we want to support them and you set them up to play a big show with you and they text you 30 minutes prior saying they dont feel well. Who cares!? Or Someone bad mouths you for absolutely no reason, acomplishing very little, and just making you not trust them. I am sorry.You get,AT MOST, 2 chances with us. We skip strike 3. Having a band not show up, or show up late, or be ass holes, or play half their set, or complain and be rude at a show you booked reflects badly on you and is something you try to avoid at all cost, and sharing a stage and maybe $ isn’t something you try to do with people who try to make you look bad. (Tip: Generally, if you have a good relationship and you have made sure to have a good reputation overall, clubs will toss aside any shit talk they hear until you do something to them, so have a good reputation and jealous green monsters trying to hurt you wont get far.)
Another thing. If you make a comittment... you keep it! Would you just not show up to work? Probably not. I dont know, Maybe you would. There is a level of comittment that you look for with co performers etc to avoid shooting yourself in the foot. So. I am making it my personal goal to find more musicians we haven’t heard and bring them to play w us because someone has to make the first step to bring all these cool groups together. We will just make sure we dont get burned. I hear people complain all the time that this big group in Utah is a bunch of douches and ass holes but, like I said, Rejection isn’t easy and usually those stories go back to a story where they rejected the upset person in the past. I dont blame them. But there is a lot of complaining and very little of anyone trying to do anything about it. Including us.
Heres the harsh reality that I tell myself everyday. If you’re good, you’ll get where you want to go. Thats all. No excuse. If you’re not seeing a growing fan base after 3 years, try something else. Dont change you. But try something new. Friends like you cause you’re their friends. Fans like you cause they connect with you. If you fool them into thinking you play Reggae cause its cool and then you start playing Heavy Metal, they’re going to be pissed and feel betrayed. Stand up if you sit, learn a loop pedal, Get a drummer, get a sax guy, play lullabies under all your songs, who cares. But how is anyone supposed to want to go see the EXACT same show every weekend for 3 or 4 years. Change it up. Thats whats so cool!! Theres NO ONE telling you what to do with your music and if they are and you dont like it, get out. Who cares what they may do for your career. Do this because you love it not cause you want to be a rockstar....well, thats fine too lol but not cause you want to be a rich ass hole. It seems those people are weeded out and shunned in the future.
Also, we are not in High School. I hear so much from people about other people etc. Here are our general rules to live by. Being a musician takes a certain amount of politics. Good Guidelines:
1: If someone wrongs you, yes, when appropriate, you can warn someone before they do business with them but NOT because its just in converstation.
2: If you believe working with someone will hurt someone else, keep your mouth shut if you dont have proof. Its unfair to nail someone to the wall for one thing they did once. If its a habit and it continues to go on, fair warning is advised. But dont tell everyone someone is an asshole and you didnt like working with them cause they drank your Dr Pepper once out of your fridge. People listen to other people about who to work with and that one person thinking they’re an ass probably will warn others.
3: And, if you are going to warn someone about a maybe issue dont be a jerk. I have seen a few people hurt by innocent passer by comments and suddenly people want to get away from them. Maybe its their fault and people should back away, but intent is 90% of the importance. If someone’s intent is to help you and you dont like how they’re doing it tell them what you want and if it doesn’t work, stop working with them.
We should all be able to take those instances as adults. I can’t believe how much shit talk I over hear. And whats funny is that its usually personal and has nothing to do with talent etc.
In my particular group, we support each other as much as we can and we have built a mutual respect and trust and if someone says stay away, I listen. A musician I trust has a word like the bible to me.
So, maybe we shouldn’t be talking about a better scene, maybe we need to talk about a better comittment to the scene. If you like something, you want it. No matter what you believe or normally do. If you hate iPhones, you may not want IT but you want something like it cause its super sweet. If someone hears a band like us, and goes “eh they’re ok”, and then they hear a band in the same style and sounds etc etc but they’re way better, guess what. They arent going to come crawling back to you. Do it your best every time and try to get better every time you perform. You cant lay stagnet foaming at the mouth and singing the same line over and over again and continue to do that over and over again, it doesn’t matter how good you are, you cant stay the exact same forever. Why do you think people like Madonna are so big?. People fall in love with a band as they grow with them and they watch them get hits. Bands are like our secret friends and when you see them on TV and hear them on Movies, you get excited because you ‘know’ them. Dont be so scared to grow and if you are going to do this for a year or the rest of your life, do it right. Keep your word. Show up.ON TIME. Besides, if clubs, bars, and Restaurants etc trust that all of this will be handled when you play they’re more likely open to having music at their places therfore opening up more performance venues. Work on getting better no matter how good you are. There is no such thing as stunted growth for a skill in my opinion. If you care enough, you will work harder and get better or come up with some harebrained skill that will get you rich overnight and retire lol. We need to support each other. I know its hard. I know it takes time, but I see a lot of bands who are stuck and SO good!!!!!

At ASCAP I heard
{“There is no Magical formula that will make you famous. There are steps you must take and if you skip one of those steps if will come back and shit you out”} -Matt Nathanson
Forget the fame. Enjoy the ride. Learn how to pay the bills and taxes on that alone if thats your dream.
OH! Dont let anyone tell you you suck so give up. I dont believe thats healthy. I have heard people originally that were horrrrible get better and we see them again and go SHIT YA! Stop telling people to quit. Be inspired by the desire. If they are jerks and suck and have no dream theyll drop out anyway and you need not make yourself look bad in their honor. I have actually seen people say these things to other people and its completely imature, mean spirited, and innapropriate. What kind of person is comfortable with telling someone to quit. Terrible!
There is so much around here that can build. Share your ideas. Be willing to let someone else carry them out if you can’t. It benefits us all! Dont be so damn selfish. “Well, I came up with it but I never told anyone and now, here, 20 years later, someone got to it and its amazing! Yay me!”lol
If Utah knew you existed and heard your music, you would see them come to your shows. Lets find a way to get all of us comitted, driven. and talented musicians out into the state and then grow. We should be nourishing the talent that is here, not putting it down, and helping them learn how to be self sufficient not stealing money from them by booking and taking more than your fair share and not telling them you’re doing that. Ex: Kyle made 200$ from the show he booked Geena. Geena recieved 30$ the the entire night and she was the only act and Kyle ONLY booked the show. People do it. Its terrible.
Dont be scared. Well.....be scared. Its scary. Let it drive you. Stop the negativity and realize that if you can bite your tongue and hold back the personal shit, those people will return the favor. Imagine a Utah where we give credit to the good and just sit down and listen for a second. Do it because its fun and we will get to be a part of this movement that can make Utah and great place for music.
If you are booking a club, Please let me give you some advice not just from us, but from other people. If we contact you to book, please get back to us as soon as you can and dont make us track you down. If you are avoiding bookng a band, tell them they dont fit and they wont bug you. If your only excuse for not booking a band is that you think the trumpet player’s hair is too long, get over it. Shit. If they show and up perform and are reliable and talented, and their hair is your only issue, get over it.Your job isn’t hooking up your friends. For the good of the venue you work for, your job is to bring in good music that people will come back for more because of it. If we ask to play and we arent that, honestly, let me know. We will work harder and contact you when we are better.
Bands. Dont call the booking person every hour all day and into the night. Dont call them after 9 unless they instruct you to do so. Most of them have day jobs. Email; yes. Follow up if no response; yes. POSSSSIBLY again follow up but stop after that. Do this in increments not one day. If you play with other people you dont know, for shit sakes, introduce yourself or at least be friendly to the other bands. You dont have to take shots all night together but honestly, where are your damn manners? OMG lol. No stories but sometimes people are jerks lol.
Guess what. You CAN make the big bucks and be a total dick band. Good luck with that.
Lets just try a tiny bit just a little to support our fellow musicians even if we dont know them. If they dont return the favor, fine. You never know why. But keep going if it sounds fun and maybe introduce yourself if you get the chance. Get off your ass. Go drink or dont, but next time there is a band near you, please, applaud at least once.
Thats my rant. MAN there is more but thats all I can say now lol.
I challenge you to re read this and think about it. Nothing I brought up was a person I know or heard of. They’re examples of what I see around me. Make good music guys. Thats all. Good to you is going to be good to someone else.